Life Coach Wanted

I need help and some advice...& maybe a life coach

...& a therapist.

So, I love my boyfriend...there's no way I'd go through all the things he puts me through unless I did, and no other reason as to why I would put up with his crap. I don't normally cry over boys...I cried over my first boyfriend a couple times...I dated a guy for two years, cried once after it was over...but this guy...thiiis one makes me cry hard, & often...& sometimes I wonder if I'm supposed to put up with it, or if it's a bad sign..if love is supposed to challenge you like this. He's definitely helped me grow up some. Half of the time he makes me feel like I'm on top of the world, but other days he makes me feel like I'm the biggest screw up & the way I live my life is wrong.
Like today, & a few times before...we got in a huge fight...he says I constantly try to please other people, guilty. I'm a people pleaser..making people happy makes me happy. But he says I do it to the point I put him on the back burner & put all these "people who dont even matter" ahead of him. First difference between us is...I believe all people matter. People come into your life for a reason, I like to make friends and maintain relationships and make people happy. He, on the other hand, thinks you only have a certain few you should commit time to...mainly because we're getting older & apparently the older you are the less friends you have? I don't know...I guess I'm just realizing how different we are & how our views of life & how to live it are opposites...I like to be busy & around others & happy & trying new things...he always tells me I'm "so happy all the time it's sickening" & that I need to realize not everything can be accomplished...He also wants way more than I can give him right now..I'm not ready to commit so much to a guy that I don't have any free weekends with friends, or time to travel/be selfish & chase my dreams, or give up my guy friends...I'm only 20...maybe I'm being selfish...I didn't get out much in highschool so I'm excited to be able to have fun, let loose, & "be free" in my 20's...I don't want to settle down yet. Is that wrong?

My questions are...how do you know when someone is meant to be in your life for good, or just temporarily? How do you know when enough is enough? & How do you know if opposites really do attract in all aspects? & How do you know when it's time to quit living for just yourself & begin thinking about settling down? I suppose that comes at different times for everyone...but sometimes I get scared I'll accidentally let go the one God intended for me & I'll end up a 40 yr old virgin cat lady.